rolling up my sleeves

It's my third week on the job, and I'm finally past the training and reading stage, and getting into the real work. I spent my first day at a rehab centre that I once was a patient at... 35 years ago! Things certainly have changed there, but I have to admit that my first hour there felt emotional in a strange way. I could feel memories of my experiences and the people I was there with, coming back in waves. It's going to be an interesting experience, one that that I'm looking forward to.

sorry

Its been weeks since I added anything to this blog. I told myself it's because I couldn't think of anything worth sharing. Truth be told, I've been going through so many changes and challenges I was scared I would be using the blog as my 'therapist' and just complain about how hard everything has been. That might have some benefit to me, maybe to you, but it just didn't feel right so I haven't blogged.

I've been preparing for one of the biggest changes I've had in years, starting a new job. I mentioned it here previously, and I'm finally starting work tomorrow. On top of that, I've been organizing my switch from a manual chair to power chair, from driving a sports coupe to a minivan, handling another broken leg, but mostly dealing with all the government red tape involved in these and other issues. It's been difficult, and has taken at times every ounce of drive I could muster.

I can see now that I'm at the point where I'll begin to see some of the benefits of everything I've been working on. It's like that sometimes. You have to get though a lot of crap to begin to see the light. It's been a lot of crap all at once for me, but now I hope to have some fun.

next stage

I'm very excited that I'm about to start a new job as an Integration Counselor. I'll be working with an organization that for years has been devoted to promoting a better life for the disabled, particularly those with spinal injuries. My role will be mainly to offer assistance and guidance to the newly disabled as they get their life back on track after the changes they've faced from becoming disabled. I'm very excited about having been given this opportunity!

ongoing lessons

I recently spent a day playing tourist in my home town. It was a great experience, but I was aware of many sets of eyes on me, looking at me with a 'not sure what to make of him' look. Even in this day and age, there are always some who still stare, but it's something I hadn't noticed happening as much as when I was first disabled 35 years ago. I'm not sure if it was because they were tourists from places where they were not used to seeing someone disabled, but there were definitely more stares than usual.

It seems there will always be someone to teach...

go for it

Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain. (unknown)

movement

I'm used to having to fight for things, and now find myself in a situation where what I'm trying to get might not be too much to expect (nice change). This week I was able to take a step back and let people who have things to offer explain how they can help, and see that I may not have to push as hard this time to get what I need. They were patient in explaining what they could contribute, listened to my concerns, and while not promising anything, I was left feeling with a sense of hope.

I'm entering into this with cautious optimism, and a sense of being supported. This is how it should be.

changes

Life is full of changes, some are big, most are small. Well I'm making a big one. For the last 35 years I've managed with a manual wheelchair, and the last 25 years driving a car. That meant getting in and out of the car in whatever weather there was. It's been getting harder, and my joints and muscles are showing signs of wear.

So I made the decision, it's time for a power chair, and (gulp), a mini-van. Over the past few days, I've been working on seeing the positive sides of this decision. I'm going to be much more mobile outside, and maybe I'll get out more since getting into my vehicle will be simpler and quicker. As for the switch from my BMW coupe to a mini-van, that was harder. I did it by finding a fun little truck that could be converted instead of a mini-van. It's smaller, cuter and cheaper. The only problem is that I found out they aren't available in Canada. Then I found out that government subsidies take up to 6 months to be processed. So my idea of an easier winter seems to be unattainable. Seems to be... so now it's time to figure out how to make this big change happen in a more timely fashion. Stay tuned...

wheelchairs can be dangerous

A few weeks back I was going to one of my Sunday family brunches. I had arrived at the restaurant ahead of everyone else for the first time, so proceeded to get out of my car. My process is to get my chair out from behind the driver's seat, then move my car seat back. As I began to move my seat, I noticed in the corner of my eye that my chair was moving away... slowly... As I reached for the chair, I realized that it wasn't moving that slowly... everything was happening in slow motion. I sat helpless as the chair moved, past the back of my car... across the lane... over to the parking entrance... down the entrance and finally to stop. Stopped by a car entering the parking lot. As the driver got out and saw where the chair came from, all I could think was what my chair might have done to his car.

The gentleman came up to me and simply said smiling, "I think you lost this?" I apologized and asked if his car was ok, and he said not to worry, it was fine... accidents happen.

So I learned, a wheelchair in the wrong hands, that is no one's hands, can be dangerous!

evolution

I've been a quad for over 35 years, as hard as it is for me to believe. I've seen myself put on a few pounds and slow down a bit. It's all been a slow progression, but the kind of progression that pretty much everyone goes through as they age.

In the last few years, I've continued to challenge myself to grow, most notably going back to school, starting a new career and moving back to Montreal. But my biggest challenge has been one that I didn't choose. It's been dealing with the aging process as a quad. I've dealt with a recent fall and the resulting broken leg. I've been less active for a number of reasons which has lowered my stamina and diminished my strength in some ways. I've had to deal with rotator cuff problems that are painful and limit my mobility. Each problem is significant in it's own way, but together they seem to grow off each other. Now I'm dealing with difficulty transferring, and it's all forcing me to deal with the reality that my level of independence is changing. Honestly, there are days that I feel that my best days are behind me. On those days, I try to remember that what I have learned in those 35 years is that those days go by, and new ones bring new hopes, new challenges and new successes.

a farewell

The final words of someone special whom we lost today.

'My friends, love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And we’ll change the world.'
Jack Layton

creativity

I've mentioned how important creativity is in finding ways around things that I couldn't otherwise do. You can be the creative one, or find others who have that gift to add to your life.

Here is one of the important creations I use. It's a part of the transfer board I use to get into my car. I found that as I moved my butt forward to get around the chair wheel, the board would often move. This little sliding metal bar moves to hold the board in place. It locks in behind the wheel frame so the board can't move forward. I hope the pic hows a bit of how it works.

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perfect fit

Today I went to see about a new wheelchair. I've been thinking about it for a few days trying to make sure I knew all the important things to consider when picking the right chair. Here's a hint... start making a list weeks before. There are so many things to consider when changing chairs, you don't want to realize once you've got the new one that it's all wrong. One little mistake can ruin it.

Just a few things to remember; is it heavier than your current chair (more weight to push around), the size is important (fitting in your home, your car, turning radius), back support height and type, folding or non-folding, foot support (will it change how you transfer), front wheel type (rubber or pneumatic) and side guards (dirt and moisture protection between wheel and your hips). By thinking about it way ahead, you can watch for things in your everyday life that may be impacted by a change in your chair.

outside

We've had a run of scorching weather lately, but today is gorgeous. There's a nice mix of sun and clouds and a gentle breeze. After a good deal of rain yesterday, the temperature is perfect. With the doors and windows open, I can hear the rustling of the leaves in the trees. It's a lovely summer's day to be alive.

Sometimes life as a quad is simply life...

coping

When people have suggested to me that it's amazing how I've coped with becoming a quadriplegic, I always say that we all have amazing coping skills, but we aren't aware of them until we are forced to face something difficult. I was reminded of that myself last week.

As I get into bed, I'm always sure to have access to my cell phone in case I should fall and need to call for help. On this particular night, I had reached the safe point, and had moved my phone out the way so I could pull my feet into bed. Something happened though, and I got an unusual spasm that threw me forward onto the floor. Once I realized what had happened and I checked to be sure there was no obvious injury, I tried several different ways to reach my phone, with no luck. I eventually realized that I wasn't going anywhere until morning (luckily I had someone coming by early that day). So I managed to pull my duvet off the bed and got as comfortable as I could, which wasn't very comfortable. It seems I had aggravated an old rib injury when I fell, and the way I was lying wasn't helping. The point of this story isn't to have anyone feel bad for me. I did enough of that for myself lying there (with the TV stuck on HGTV). What it reminded me (after it was all over), is that somehow through the toughest situations we find a way to get through it. That doesn't mean it's easy, but we get through it.

falling prey

We've all heard about those scams that target seniors trying to get at their money, and I can't count how many emails I've gotten from deposed African monarchs wanted my help to regain their fortune. There are also scammers who are more focused on whom they prey on. They take the time to research who they are going after. Being disabled, we are often perceived as more gullible, less able to protect ourselves.

The old adage, 'if it seems too good to be true, then it must be' works well here. Just be aware you might be a target, and if you think you are being scammed, call the police.

seeing red

As a quadraplegic we are more likely to suffer from bladder infections. There are many things you can do to help prevent these, including being sure to drink enough fluids. I remember hearing years ago how cranberry juice can help prevent bladder infections. Something in the cranberry juice helps prevent the bacteria from attaching to the walls of the urinary tract.

I came across this article that talks a bit more about it (link in 'helpful links). It talks about cranberries being used to prevent or treat UTIs (urinary tract infections). Worth a read.

tribute

I've mentioned before that I've got a fierce independent streak. As independent as I might be, I need people in my life, for many reasons. I want to dedicate this blog to one of the most selfless people in my life, my brother.

The place I moved into has a great balcony, but it wasn't accessible. There was no simple solution to change that. My brother and I both love the challenge of finding unusual solutions. Unfortunately, we have working styles that are polar opposites. Despite that and an insanely busy life, my brother gave me the time and effort to solve that problem.

Today I went out on my balcony by myself for the first time. I watered my garden. I picked tomatoes. I watched the world from above. I wondered how I could ever thank my brother properly.

slippery slope

If you use any type of transfer board like me (both wood, one for bed and one for the car), you may notice over time that sliding seems more difficult. Once you've eliminated the possibility that you've gained weight, you can blame the board.

A useful remedy is to treat the surface so it is more slippery. One easy way I happened upon by accident, is spraying it, or wiping it with Armor All or another car care cleaner. One day after cleaning my car seats with it, I nearly went flying as I slid out of my car. It really works!

One word of caution, if you get it on your hands, there goes your grip. That of course means pushing as you transfer is back to being hard...

keeping in touch

Whether you live alone, or spend any time alone, you're likely to face a scenario where you're going to need to reach someone. It might be that you've fallen, or you're simply stuck and can't get to your normal sources of communication. Trust me, it's something you want to plan for because when it happens and you can't reach help, you'll have plenty of time to wish you had planned.

There are many ways to do it, a cell phone that you always keep on you, one of those systems where you simply press a button and a call center answers, or the more sophisticated ones that can tell you've fallen without having to push any button. Shop around, because some of these can be pricey.

One of my problems has been that my cell phone does not work in my underground parking. That was taken care of by installing a 'phone repeater' which basically increases the signal strength in confined spaces.

Think about ways to deal with these kind of situations beforehand, and avoid having to swear at yourself with your loud outside voice...

distraction

If you're looking for something to distract you, here's something I heard about.... 'The Book of Awesome' and 'The Book of (even more) Awesome. In my 'helpful links' I put the page about #840, popping bubble wrap. Other awesome things listed on the cover include snow days, bakery air and finding money in your pocket. I haven't bought either book or the calendar, but I've seen the author interviewed. Based on on that, and what's on this link, it looks awesome (no pun intended) and I'll be picking up a copy.

Have fun being distracted...